Death of an era
So the inevitable happened. Time has run out on what I thought would have been the rest of my life. I won't lie, it's pretty shitty to have broken up after close to 4 years together. I guess now I get how people who have been together for a while can suddenly part ways.
I know from my point of view that I screwed up most of my parts in this relationship and that was definitely a driving factor in the break up. Then I got to talking with some friends and some of them are trying to defend me by questioning actions that she has done in the months leading up to the break up. A big one was definitely the POF stuff explained in the previous post. To add to that, she also went on Tinder eventually as well. Sure as hell Tinder was not built to be a networking application. As such, they've gone ahead and questioned if there was someone else in her life that she may have gotten attached to or something. This could very well be it, but i'm too afraid to ask and i'm not sure if I really want to know. On the flip side, if it was another guy, it would totally help me get through this rut and instead of beating myself up, it'd just convert to anger and just motivate me more to push past all of this. But short of becoming an overly attached ex-bf, I really doubt i'll ever find out unless someone decides to leak this information out to me.
Another good theory that a friend came up with was that the surrounding friends that she hangs out with constantly remind her of things that she isn't getting with our relationship. For example let's say her friends are all out dating and telling her stories of some wacky adventures they've gone on and then compare it to our relationship. This may change her perception of how she wants a relationship to be and therefore turns and asks me to do this, that and the other all at once.
So many different reasons that could have caused this but I think one of these two in combination with my screw ups were probably the driving force.
Apart from that, I think i'm doing pretty well. If I can offer any advice to someone who is going through the same thing as me, it definitely helps to have a good set of friends to hang out with and chat. I wouldn't necessarily say that drinking is a good solution simply because that is a depressant and honestly when you're down, you don't need to be further downed. I've avoided getting piss drunk for that very reason and most likely if I were to reach that level, i'm sure I would do something extremely stupid.
Oh and going to the gym is a great way to get your mind off things. I've probably gone to the gym at least 5-7 times in the past 2 weeks and it helps tire me out.
That is all I really have to say right now. Until next time when my brain needs to talk!
I know from my point of view that I screwed up most of my parts in this relationship and that was definitely a driving factor in the break up. Then I got to talking with some friends and some of them are trying to defend me by questioning actions that she has done in the months leading up to the break up. A big one was definitely the POF stuff explained in the previous post. To add to that, she also went on Tinder eventually as well. Sure as hell Tinder was not built to be a networking application. As such, they've gone ahead and questioned if there was someone else in her life that she may have gotten attached to or something. This could very well be it, but i'm too afraid to ask and i'm not sure if I really want to know. On the flip side, if it was another guy, it would totally help me get through this rut and instead of beating myself up, it'd just convert to anger and just motivate me more to push past all of this. But short of becoming an overly attached ex-bf, I really doubt i'll ever find out unless someone decides to leak this information out to me.
Another good theory that a friend came up with was that the surrounding friends that she hangs out with constantly remind her of things that she isn't getting with our relationship. For example let's say her friends are all out dating and telling her stories of some wacky adventures they've gone on and then compare it to our relationship. This may change her perception of how she wants a relationship to be and therefore turns and asks me to do this, that and the other all at once.
So many different reasons that could have caused this but I think one of these two in combination with my screw ups were probably the driving force.
Apart from that, I think i'm doing pretty well. If I can offer any advice to someone who is going through the same thing as me, it definitely helps to have a good set of friends to hang out with and chat. I wouldn't necessarily say that drinking is a good solution simply because that is a depressant and honestly when you're down, you don't need to be further downed. I've avoided getting piss drunk for that very reason and most likely if I were to reach that level, i'm sure I would do something extremely stupid.
Oh and going to the gym is a great way to get your mind off things. I've probably gone to the gym at least 5-7 times in the past 2 weeks and it helps tire me out.
That is all I really have to say right now. Until next time when my brain needs to talk!
posted by Hang-Time at 6:02 PM
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